Disclaimer: I apologize for the huge margins. I was tired and didn't feel like taking the time to fix things after adding the picture of the . . . well read on and see.

Okay. Okay. I know. Time for a new post. It's amazing just how fast three weeks without a new post can go by.
I have one small happy to share and one semi serious "what I would do if".

My Small Happy;

This morning I just happened to look at the package of Oreo's on my dresser that Don bought last week and has been slowly eating for the last several days. All by himself.

I try to resist the Oreo temptation.
In fact I can honestly say that Don had pretty much had the entire bag to himself.

However,

This morning I looked at the empty package that had somehow managed to get polished off without any help from me.

I nudged it. You know? to make sure that it was indeed empty?!?


Yup. Just as I figured.

Empty.

One dead bag of Oreo's.
Or was it?


I looked inside.

Just to satisfy my curiosity before I toss it away. of course


Empty. Empty. empty. . . empty?????

Wait!

One small crumb. Just cookie. No cream.

Don't mind if I do.
Waaaait!

Do I see a larger flash of dark brown?

Way back in the way back.

One. Lonely. Forgotten. Oreo.

Wellll???

Well what? Of course I ate it. How lovely to have the one, last, almost undiscovered, Oreo.

Just one small problem. An unforeseen little dilemma concerning the dynamics of eating the LAST Oreo.

Do you know how frustrating it is to not be able to reach in and have. . . .

ONE

MORE

OREO???????

Now for my "What I would do IF"

You know how there are always old ladies who drench themselves in the most nasty obnoxious smelling perfumes ever. It's like you smell them coming five minutes before you can even spot them. And the stench of their favorite fragrance usually lingers in the air for hours afterwards.

And heaven FORBID you ever wind up in an elevator with a few of the red hatted dears who have apparently gone swimming in the stuff before descending on the mall.

Oh yes. I think you know exactly what I'm talking about.

Well this is what I have decided to do if I ever end up winning a really big lottery. Well or making it rich in some other unlikely way.

I would go to every store. Every place wherever. Within, say, a 50 mile radius of Kennewick. Anywhere that they still sell one of the absolute worst smelling "Old Lady" Perfumes of all time.
Windsong

And buy up every single, retched, reeking, nasty smelling bottle of the stuff I can find. Then take it to the closest incinerator and destroy it all.

BWAAA HAAAAA HAAAAA HAAAA!!!! yes that's right cue the evil laugh

Avon used to have an equally horrible fragrance called Bird of Paradise. If you ever come across a rogue bottle of it please do what ever it takes to destroy it.

If I have offended anyone by this post, please realize that first of all

I. DON'T. CARE.

And second, be happy that you know once and for all that the people who run when they smell you coming aren't being rude at all.

It is simply an act of

Self preservation!