Online maddness, or, This is progress?

My blogging buddy Tiffani, just got her water turned off. Now she admits to being partly to blame for this. I don't agree with her at all though, I think she was simply a victim of "THE SYSTEM". To read about her little mishap go HERE, read it and I'll see ya back here in just a bit.

All right, I have had this post in mind since almost the time I started my blog. I just could never remember it. I still have quite a few of these ideas crawling around in the southern most point in my head. I will post them as I remember them. So here is my post inspired by Tiffani.

For several years now I have been increasingly frustrated by the new thinking, that:

Anything worth doing, is worth doing ON LINE.

I simply don't agree with this. If I have a problem with something, the last thing I want to do is sit down and write an e-mail. Oooh, an e-mail. You can't get more direct than that.

Hah! I don't think so.

Call me old minded but if I have a problem, especially one that I expect someone to solve, the last thing I want is to sit around and wait for my e-mail to be answered.

You see, I always have questions. Always.

When you are conversing via e-mail, it's not exactly the best format for questions. Quite often when I have questions and someone gives me an answer, all that usually does is lead to more questions.

If I am in the middle of a transaction, of any kind, I want to speak to a HUMAN!

Now you would think that procuring a number and trying to go the phone route would be less painful.

WRONG!!!

I don't want to have to go through seven or eight, screens, being told what number to press, only to end up at another series of numbers to press to really get to where you want to go. This "round and round the mulberry bush" type of telephonery, is so infuriating that by the time I have an actual person on the phone (and if I'm lucky, one that doesn't have a strong Indian accent) I am usually so angry, that it's hard to not take it out on the person who has just asked, "how may I help you"?

As if this kind of technology isn't bad enough, now every one and their poodle, want you to start conducting all of your business online.

The cable company, the electric company, your credit card company, your mortgage holder, the fine people at the garbage hauling and water providing companies.

They all are trying their hardest to convince you to pay your bill and conduct any other matters you might have with them,

On Line.

As far as I'm concerned, paying bills on-line is a method of last resort.

I will stick with,
writing a check,
then writing the amount paid on the included invoice,
putting that and the check in the envelope,
sealing the envelope,
putting my return address on the envelope,(cause after all, ya just never know),
putting a stamp on the envelope and sticking it in the outgoing mail box.

Yes I will do all of that instead of,

Going upstairs to my computer,
finding the exact site I need to go to,(I usually google it no matter how sure I am of the web address)
Try to remember what my user name and password is for this site, (after all using the same one for each site makes it easier for the I.D. thieves)
Hitting the "I forgot my user name and/or password" button,
go to my e-mail to see what help they have sent me,
run through the complicated process of finding out your user name and/or password.
Going back and doing it all over because you may have originally forgotten one little line that had an asterisk by it that meant it was required.
Go back to your e-mail and try it again.
After two failed attempts, search everywhere on the site for a phone number, so you can get a real person to talk to and explain to them that you are not having any luck with finding your old user name and password.

Go through the excruciating phone game that I earlier described.

I will skip through the next ten steps and move on to the point where I now have my user name and password.

Locate and click the "make a payment" button.
Go to the next huge screen demanding every last bit of financial information you could possibly have.
Fill it out to the best of your ability, knowing that no matter how careful you are it's still going to come back saying that you didn't enter one of the "required" fields properly.
Get caught in this loop for at least five cycles until you finally realize what tiny little bit of information you have neglected to fill in. (Probably the name of your childhood pet)
After twenty minutes of this exercise in frustration, finally get to the point where you are asked to hit the process button.
HIT IT! And pray that instead of another error screen, it will come back with those most desired words;
You have successfully completed this transaction.

Now I don't know about you, but by this point, I have exactly two nerves left.

And at least three more bills that need to be paid.

I know that my son Donald and my brother Mike are going to roll their eyes at me. Maybe, just maybe the rest of you will as well.

I just would like to know, why I am considered such a dinosaur for wanting to pay my bills the way I've always paid them. Most of them I mail, a few I actually pay in person.

Ya know what? I like the paying in person scenario the best.

I just can't believe though that I'm the only one out there who doesn't find the whole on-line process, simply too frustrating to be of any real use.

If I ever have a complete nervous breakdown, it won't be because of my kids. It won't be because of the economy or the high price of toilet paper.

No the final straw for me will be with one more person saying to me (over the phone)

"You know? You can always pay that on-line".