Susan's fun and clever ( hopefully ) little blogging quiz

Guess what my lucky readers???? For quite a while now I have wanted to make up my own little survey, slash, tag, thing, and now I think I have come up with a good one. Please feel free to play along, in fact the very thought of people playing along just makes me giddy with excitement.

I have had a few conversations with others lately (primarily my brother Mike and sometimes Donald and Lisa) and I have seen and heard and read other things that have made me wonder where I stand in the blogging world when it comes to being totally obsessed (or, maybe just a teensy, weensy bit) with blogging. I am interested to see if people are as fanatical as me umm (cough,cough) other people I know.

Now first I guess I need to come up with a point system.

How about this? There will be a scale of 1 to 5. That means that five is the most agree while one is the least. So to make it clear there will be, Five, meaning; I am so saturated with guilt that I leave a little slimy guilt trail wherever I go. All the way down to One, which I guess would stand for; Are you kidding me? I do actually have a life you know.

Now just to comfort those that may identify with the high end of the scale versus the low end, please know that I am sure my final score will probably be quite HIGH. In other words (If I am to be believed at least, and sometimes I'm not entirely sure how trustworthy I am in these sorts of things)

There will be NO shame in a high score. After all this is just for fun........ well and because I guess I can be a little nosy.

It would be really great if you would leave me a comment and let me know what you scored.

And just to clarify, one and five are the two extremes, I guess we could say that three would mean something like; I'm so on the fence that my butt has marks from the pointy pickets. In other words use your own judgement on where in the scale you would place yourself.

All right here goes. TUM TUMM TUMM TUMM (and please cue the drum roll)

Susan Sorenson's slightly nosey blogging quiz

1) I am the kind of blogger that likes to meet lots of different people and add them to my friends list.

2) I am so consumed with blogging that I check my blog for new comments at least 3 times a day (the key word here being, AT LEAST)

3) I would give up a hot date on the town with my closest loved one to just sit home and blog.

4) One of the first things I think about in the morning is my blog.

5) One of the first things I do in the morning is go to my computer and check my blog, and see if anyone has left a new comment since when I snuck out of bed at 3 AM, for a supposed potty break and instead really went to check my blog for new comments. (I want to make sure that everyone understands that this questionnaire is not necessarily biographical)

6) I read the comments of the other blogs I read, more than once, (sometimes several more times than once) to see who has commented after me and if anyone has said anything to me in their comment (keep in mind we are talking someone else's blog here, not yours) .

7) Note) This question is more or less a five or a one. I have left a comment on a friend's blog who hasn't updated in a long time to let them know that I am anxiously awaiting their next post.

8) I have shamelessly recruited others to join the blogging world.

9) I have a give-away or contest about every 25 posts or so.

10) I sometimes have been known to write as many as three or more posts in one day.

11) I simply cannot understand or comprehend people who do not blog.

12) I lurk or stalk or whatever term you prefer, other's blogs, without making myself known to them.

13) I am so addicted to blogging that I am seriously thinking of starting a local chapter of Blogger's Anonymous, to help me A. get my life back B. make people think I am trying to get my life back. Or even, C. Hope to meet other people masquerading as someone who needs help so I can meet even more people as addicted to blogging as I am.

14) This Christmas I will probably spend more time spreading blogging cheer, than the time I will actually spend, shopping, wrapping, breaking up fights between children, reminding children that Santa doesn't visit naughty children, and decorating my house.

15) Note;Another One or Fiver.) Have you ever, even for a second, thought when it comes to blogging; SOMEONE PLEASE HELP ME!!!!!

There you have reached the end of my little quiz. Oh you know what? I think I will do a little guide to let you know where you stand. So here it is.

75- 65 : Sorry, but you probably need to step away from your computer before the funny little men come to take you away. (And I mean that in the kindest and most understanding way possible.)

64-48 : You seem to be a little too consumed with blogging but as long as you are taking regular showers and your butt doesn't have blisters you're probably okay.

47-32 : It appears that you have a pretty good handle on this thing called blogging. Just one thing. Are you SURE you were completely HONEST?

31-15 : Oh come ON you call yourself a BLOGGER????

I hope you participate. And, I hope you enjoy yourself while participating. And I hope you leave me a comment telling me roughly what your score is, and what you thought of my little quiz.

P.S. I just took it and scored a 48. I can't wait to see how the rest of you do.+

Update!!!!

I just took my quiz again because I thought my score seemed a little low.

It was.

Apparently I lied on number 15. Okay with a few honest adjustments, my new score is . . . . .

55 OOOHH what do you think of that Sammy Hagar?

Tidbits

Alright, first off, I would like us all to observe a moment of silence for poor,poor, sad and depressed Heather Locklear......................................................................................................
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Okay that seems good enough.

Today, I have decided to pontificate on the subject of TV Commercials.

Sometimes I wonder, if an alien species was to watch our culture and try to figure us out, and if all they had to go by were our commercials, what on earth would they think of us? I shudder to think of the conclusions they would come to, especially if they were to also watch some of those European ones. But then I think I would shudder even more to realize that those conclusions may not be too far from the truth.At least for a lot of the population.

Not we saintly, intelligent, kind hearted and compassionate members of the blogging world of course.

My brother Mike, quite some time ago, did a blog about certain commercials and it inspired me to do one of my own someday.
So here goes.

The commercials that have really gotten on my poor frayed nerves lately have been the ones for

CAT FOOD.

Now I think most every person of normal intelligence who owns a cat knows what cats like to eat.

Oh no! I just realized that this reminds me that George Carlin has just passed away. I know it's a bother but George really does deserve a moment of silence..................................................................
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Sorry for the interruption, but I really did like George Carlin. And this is why cat food made me think of him ; He had a joke that I'm sure many of you have probably heard. He said ; You know we have all these cat food companies trying to figure out what flavors cats like best. I don't see why it's so hard, all you have to do is watch a cat for a couple of hours and you will know. A cat's favorite flavor is

BUTT!!!!

Hee hee hee, ya gotta love that George Carlin.

Okay I will get back on subject. That was just a little sample of how my mind works. I didn't call this blog Non Linear Thinking for nothing, after all.

Now the cat food commercials that really drive me crazy are the ones for, I think it's called Beneful or something similar, cat food. I know that there's a whole natural organic foods thing movement going on right now. I know that to achieve optimum health one should eat

FIVE SERVINGS OF FRUITS AND VEGETABLES A DAY.

I just can't believe that this advice should include cats.
If the good folk at Purina pet foods who actually make the stuff are to be believed, poor little Spot and Fluff Fluff, are doing nothing all day but sitting around and dreaming of Vegetables. And (alas) sadly for them, we nincompoop pet owners are just too thick to realize that their great desire and need for these veggies is going mostly un-met.

So here comes Beneful cat food ( well, and dog food too, we certainly can't neglect our dear canine friends now can we) to the rescue. Now little Angel and Buster can eat their fill of their daily requirement of vegetables. Oh and don't forget the whole grains, like rice and wheat and barley.
There is just one thing I would like to know.

What one earth is the daily requirement of fruits and vegetables and grains for your average house cat?????????

Now we have a cat. She is a squish-faced Persian. That means that her eyes and her nose are on the same line and that her mouth is just barely below her eye-nose-eye. She has a hard time eating because of the unfortunate configuration of her face. Fortunately the breeders have finally realized that if they kept this up these cats would end up with their mouth above their eyes. So they have backed off and now most Persians have a more normal face. Unfortunately for Sasha though, she happens to be one of the unlucky failed experiments in Persian Cat Facery Technology.

We have had a lot of normal cats over the years though. And never once, no not ONCE, did we ever drop a piece of broccoli on the floor and have that cat come and scoop it up. Same goes for carrots or peas or even that most desired of all foods (this according to the commercial of course) RICE!

Somehow I just can't stretch my imagination enough to see someone putting down a bowl of nicely prepared mixed vegetables for Little Snowball and having her greedily eat it all up and look around for more.

So I must conclude that these commercials are LYING. It is a complete falsehood that cats are craving all those healthy ingredients that we are paying so handsomely for.

Alright now on to ................... SLOGANS.

Here are a few of the slogans that i have heard over the years that drive me crazy.

Remember when the name brand of ibuprofen, Nuprin, I think it's name was, came out. It's brilliant campaign claimed that it was,

LITTLE.....YELLOW.....DIFFRENT!!!

Now call me overly critical but who the (oommpphh sometimes it's frustrating writing a G rated Blog) Heck is really going to buy one brand over another just because it is LITTLE and YELLOW?
I remember the first time I ever heard this ridiculous ad and thinking that other than Shawn (who loves every slogan and jingle he's ever heard) no-one will ever be swayed by that stupid slogan. And you know what? I think I was right. I don't think they even make Nuprin anymore.

On a more local front, there is Marchant Furniture. Now their big reason to come and buy their furniture isn't THE BEST SELECTION or THE BEST PRICES. Oh no, no, no, no. Their big claim to fame is that they are.......JUST MINUTES FROM ANYWHERE. Wow how can I not just jump in the car and drive right over, after all it is , just minutes from ANYWHERE.

Got that people living in California and Texas? Come to Marchant's home furnishings, they after all are, JUST MINUTES FROM ANYWHERE.

One more commercial that I actually think is kinda cute but also really disturbing, are the Charmin Toilet Paper Ads, with the animated bears. (Yeah I know, what is it with me and toilet paper?) I don't know, there's just something about Naked Bears out in the woods doing their business and then wiping themselves with TOILET PAPER!!!!!!! I cringe every time these ones come on. I have pretty much figured it out that they use bears because they somehow think it's more tasteful than showing animated humans in their own bathrooms going and then using toilet paper. Sorry but I think wiping after you have, you know, is just too delicate of a subject even for bears.

There are so many other commercials I could bring up but I am being harassed by granddaughters to hurry up and take them to get Great Grandma Brinkerhoff and go out to lunch and shopping. I do this almost every Thursday for my mom. Sometimes even with grand kids in tow.

So I will leave you with this happy thought.

No matter how unhappy you are at the moment, just think, I bet you are happier than Heather Locklear!

Life as a Grandma

Well, I was just sitting down to go over bills this morning when the phone rang. I just barely glanced at the name and number and it said Kennewick General Hospital. I answered it immediately and it was Lisa. "What are you doing at Kennewick General?" I ask.

Pointless I know. What else would she be doing at the Hospital?

Of course it was our sweet baby girl Elisabeth. Elisabeth, as I'm sure most of my readers know has several, severe and life threatening conditions. The most recent is Infantile Spasms. It's funny how such a serious and life threatening condition should have such a harmless almost banal sounding name. This simple sounding, deadly acting condition causes her to have clusters of spasms throughout the day. Tiny looking little spasms that if you didn't know what to look for you might not even notice. The problem with these nasty, sneaky, little spasms is that each one kills off a little bit of her brain each time she has one. I'm not going into anymore detail because it is redundant for most of you that know about Elisabeth and for anyone who is interested go to my link to Lisa's blog here on this page.

Okay, now to get to my main reason for this post.

Lisa had been at the hospital for quite a while and my dear little granddaughters Alexandra (Lex) and Lorelai (Lori) were climbing the curtains (fortunately not the walls.........Yet.) Lisa told me that the girls wanted Grandma to come get them and take them away from it all.

A cry for help!

Suddenly I turn into SUPER GRANDMA!!!! Super Grandma; able to leap into her van within ten to fifteen minutes of a call for help. (Hey, I had to find my sandals, and I hadn't brushed my
teeth yet, my mouth was feeling really grotty, and my glasses were really messy and needed cleaning. The point is I got there within probably 25 minutes.)
So I find a place to park (an undertaking not for the faint of heart). I go into the emergency department, and since Lisa is pretty well known there by now, I get to go back to see them with only the bare minimum of red tape.

Lex and Lori are SOOO happy to see me.

I like to think that this is all due to a bad case of "Grandma Love" and of course it is..... partially. But to be honest , I do understand a certain "Emergency Room Fever" that comes from being stuck in a small curtain enclosed room for an hour or more, while waiting for a doctor or even a nurse (sometimes I think even a cleaning lady would be a nice and welcome reprieve) to come in and eventually tell you to GO HOME.

So yes the girls were happy to see me. I can't say for sure but I think Lisa was pretty relieved as well.
They were also mighty pleased to be going to my house because they know that their two cousins, my too oldest granddaughters who are staying with me for almost two weeks, will be there. They love their cousins and for the most part they usually all get along very well.

Now of course they wanted their cousins more than they wanted grandma. So much for the whole "Grandma love" business.

Abbey and Lindsay were gone when I left to go to the Hospital. And No. No matter how that might sound, I was not being irresponsible and misplacing grandchildren. No they were simply down the street playing with friends. And since I did NOT want to show up at the hospital with a posse I left them where they were. Oh, I just realized that this might still sound bad. Not to worry, not to worry. Kelly; my still lives at home at 26, (yeah I know. 26?. But he does have many redeeming qualities. I swear!) well, Kelly was home, as was Shawn, so I figure that amounts to almost as much responsibility as one grandma.

The girls and I get home. They want to go play with their cousins. I tell them I'm not sure where cousins are. Then of course to make it look like I have NO idea what I am talking about Who should pop up? The cousins of course.

Lorelai is hungry. Alexandra is hungry. Abbey and Lindsay, not so hungry. But now that I mention it to them, they suddenly decide that while, maybe not exactly hungry, they do want to know what kind of foodstuffs I might be offering.

Oh I should also mention that Abbey and her nice little friend Summer, from down the street, are out on my patio playing with BRATZ DOLLS.

Yeah I know.

First time ever that I'm sure Abbey has even seen one that's not still in it's package at the store.

Nyuh, I try not to judge.

Now Abbey will be ten in a little over a month. The significance of this is that she fancies herself almost a teenager. That is code for "Grandma, can you make Lindsay go away and leave me and Summer alone. (Not little cousins, of course. They still have enough of a cuteness factor as to make one envied by one's peers) . Now I am pretty experienced in how to diffuse this situation. I simply take Lex and Lori away from Abbey (who in my opinion doesn't deserve the attention they are bringing) and give them to Lindsay. "Lindsay" I say "will you please go and wash your hands and make sure the girls wash theirs too."

Don't get me wrong. Lindsay isn't always that thrilled about supervising the washing of hands. BUT if it means that she is the one to be in charge of the little girls, and if it means that Abbey isn't. Well I'm sure you can figure the outcome for yourself.

Last night (well every Sunday night really) Donald and Lisa came over for dinner. Now I had seen the picture of Donald making Chicken Kabobs on the grill on Lisa's blog. I figured why not?

So I made my first ever Chicken Kabobs last night......... To mixed reviews I must add, to be completely honest.

Lorelai is not a fan of anything on a Bob.

So when Lex and Lindsay see all the leftover bamboo skewers they decide that lunch will not be complete without Cheese, Red Grape and Apple-slice kabobs. With (A.) peanut butter- ritz crackers for Alexandra and, (B.) half a peanut butter and jam sandwich for Linds.

Lorelai, of course, wants nothing to do at all with anything on a bob so to make her happy I just put all her cut up stuff on a small hefty foam plate.

The ever so grown up Abbey hears all this activity and simply must come in to see what we are up to. And since I can still (believe it or not) remember being almost ten and having a friend over and wanting to impress that friend, I offer to make some kabobs for her and Summer as well. But, I tell her, I am going to make the little girl's theirs first.

Abbey is very content with this condition, I think, letting her categorize Lindsay as one of the LITTLE girls is enough to placate her.

Well, "Three Little Girls" head out to the patio to eat their lunch. And before even a minute is up (and much to my NON-surprise) Three Little Girls, come right back in to inform me that NOW Lorelai wants her little cut-up tidbits on a kabob.

SUPER GRANDMA to the rescue again.

With amazing speed and dexterity SUPER GRANDMA makes short work of kabobbing Lori's little bits of this and thats.

Lori is now happy. And Three Little Girls head back outside to eat their lunch.

After lunch they decide that a bit of wagon pulling will be a fun activity. Last year for Father's Day. All my kids got together and bought Dear old Dad (my husband Don) a nice big red wagon with the wooden slats all around. Kind of like the wagon world's equivalent of the old Woody Station Wagons. He uses this for transporting plants and dirt and wood, or anything else that he wants to carry from point A to point B. The thing that has made this wagon such a hit with our grandkids are,

WAGON RIDES.

Oh yes, they love to be pulled in the wagon by grandpa. And it didn't take long for them to figure out that they can also pull each other in the wagon. AND, after all the fights are over about who will pull who, they usually have lots of fun. So about twenty minutes today was devoted to wagon rides. Every possible combination of who pulling who was tried out. I think that little three year old Lori even got her way when she insisted on pulling everyone else. I'm sure that was probably the shortest of all the rides, but can you think of a better way to shut a three year old up?

So cousins had been greeted, lunch had been planned and eaten, fights had been neutralized, wagon rides had been had. All in all a pretty good afternoon. And, just before Lex and Lori could start to think, "where is Mamma?"

Mamma showed up with baby Elisabeth.


All in all a very good reason to be a Grandma!

Lindzay sayz

This just in:
Okay so I'm getting ready to take Abbey and Lindsay to meet up with Donald and Lisa at the mushroom pool.

(That would be Kennewick's wading pool with a ten foot high cement mushroom in the middle with water cascading down from it. Every bit as fun as it sounds.)

The girls have been playing with Michael and Nicky the two boys, two houses down, that they are very good friends with. (Lindsay and Michael have a little thing going on. Nothing inappropriate of course.)

So they have their swimsuits on and we are pulling out of the driveway and they are telling me all about Michael's three legged cat. When Lindsay looks at me and, in the most serious little seven going on eight in a few weeks, voice she can muster tells me "And she just had KITTENS Grandma. (Okay okay I think, that cat is always having kittens)

Lindsay continues.

"Yeah she just had four kittens. And guess what Grandma? SHE DIDN'T EVEN GO TO THE

HOSPITAL !!

SHE HAD THEM AT HOME!!!!!!

Yes, Yes, feel free to laugh. I sure did.

Have a happy weekend, and keep a good thought!

More This More That

Once again I have lots of random thoughts floating around in my head so this post may skip around a bit. You know the whole "Stream of Consciousness thing" Let's see, what should go first?

Oh yeah!

This is something that has been on my mind for some time.

I wonder if most of you that live in or around the Tri-Cities have had occasion to visit the new (well by now semi-new) Richland Target? I have quite a few times. It's sometimes a nice change from the Kennewick store. There is just one thing that really gets on my nerves about this new Target, and it's " surrounding, help-pay-the-rent, neighbor stores." You may be thinking, now what has Susan found in an Innocent shopping center to cause her such anguish? And of course you know I will gladly share my pain with anyone willing to listen. What I don't like about this nice little slice of retail heaven is their. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

PARKING LOT!!!!!

Yes that's right I have a real problem with their parking lot. In my opinion it is one of the BOSSIEST parking lots I have ever seen. You pull into it and it doesn't really matter which side or end you use, you are instantly told by the big black BOSSY lines and arrows exactly which way you have to go. And to make it even more Anal Retentive, there are concrete curbs everywhere! No more "oh gee there is no one in that section I guess I will just cut over a few parking lanes and then go right (or left).

Oh no no no you can't do that because of those stupid curbs.

And you can't go more than three or four car lengths before coming to a super, super bossy STOP written on the pavement. I just don't see the need for such a (sophisticated?) system here in our nice, mostly safe (at least while doing a bit of parking lot driving) little, homey Tri-Cities. It's almost like they have a bad case of "small town parking lot syndrome"

Okay enough of that I feel so much better having gotten that off my chest.

Now I would like to direct your thoughts towards,

Watermelons.

I love a good watermelon. The only problem with them is that I have a side by side refrigerator. In layman's terms that means that the refrigerator section of my side by side is just not very wide. Now Donald and Lisa, THEY have a REFRIGERATOR. The freezer is a drawer on the bottom so the shelves in the fridge don't have to share space with the other side. The only drawback I can see in this is that they don't have an ice dispenser in the door. And they don't have much room in their freezer for things like ice cream. They have solved that problem quite nicely though, they simply come to my house and eat my ice cream. In fact I am so gosh darn accommodating that I think of their preferences when I do my ice cream shopping.

Oh sorry I guess I got a little off track there. Back to Watermelons.

Now this is my dilemma with watermelons. They are so big that once it is cut and we have eaten our fill, there is still a good chunk of watermelon that really likes to be in the nice cold fridge. Have you tried putting it in the fridge though? If you don't double wrap it with plastic wrap you will have watermelon soup on the shelves of you fridge. Well that seems simple enough, doesn't it. Double wrap it with plastic wrap. Not as easy as it sounds. Wrapping anything the size and shape of a cut watermelon is a huge pain in the neck. Even with the finest plastic wrap which money can buy.

That, by the way, would be Walmart's store brand. Really. Try it and you'll see what I mean.

Well as far as I am concerned the less time spent in the kitchen wrangling with a cut watermelon, the better. I actually have decided that since that watermelon will probably be all gone in two days maybe three tops, that it is mostly alright to just leave it out on the counter.

Does that horrify some of you?

I hope not. I am the only one in the whole history of my family who has ever had food poisoning and it came from a restaurant, not from my sometimes questionable kitchen practices.

So yes, most the time it stays out on the counter. That of course comes with it's own set of problems. Now instead of watermelon soup on the shelf in my fridge, I have it all over my counter. And as everyone knows a mess on the kitchen counter doesn't stay on the kitchen counter. Oh no no no. It quickly takes the path of least resistance and ends up all over the floor.

So sorry watermelon growers, even though I love your sweet juicy product, I won't very often buy it because it is just too much trouble.

Now don't bother to suggest the little individual watermelons. I have been tempted trust me. It's just that the best price I have ever seen on those is 2.50 each. That probably doesn't sound like much AND if I was just going to buy one just for ME, I might do it. But then I would have to sneak it into the house and wait til everybody was gone (this hardly EVER happens). If I was to sit down in the middle of Sorenson Central, and try to enjoy my sweet little individual watermelon, EVERYONE , except for Shawn (he's not a fan) would ask "Where is MINE????" So as you can see watermelon is something I am deprived of on an almost daily basis.

I guess I will add a few positives. Here are a few things I like.

I love Fabric Stores. I love fabric. I love the feel of it. I love the colors and the patterns and the different textures.

I love flowers. We have quite a few. I help pick them out and Don plants them.

I love my wonderful patio. In Lisa's blog about her perfect weekend, the picture of Donald and the girls roasting marshmallows were taken on my lovely patio. (The fact that it was all my idea and that Don at first said "We can't have that much cement back here") makes me love it all the more.

I love going to the park by the Library with Lisa and the girls. And this week it will also be with my two oldest granddaughters as well because Abbey and Lindsay are here with me for several days.

I love Cats and Kittens. Actually though this isn't entirely true. I like them in theory. I just don't like being jumped on or being expected to pet them and scratch them or heaven forbid, HOLD them.

I love Hanford's Friday off. (No explanation needed on this one)

Oh there are so many things I could list but I don't really want to compete with Donald for "longest post ever" so I guess I will bid everyone,

A Fond Adieu.

What I did for my birthday

I feel bad that I never talked about my birthday on the 6th. Not bad because I have a huge ego and figure that everyone has been sitting on the edge of their computer chairs wondering "What did Susan do for her Birthday? I simply MUST know!" No, no, no, no, no. I like to think that out of all my bad qualities (or would it be character flaws? I can't ever keep those straight) well out of all those, having an overinflated ego has fortunately never been one of them.

No I simply feel that it is important to give credit where credit is due.

First up goes to my beloved husband Don. Don loves me with all his heart. He is usually very good at making up to me.Now by that I don't mean when we fight, although he's always gotten A pluses for that too. Even when I am really the one at fault.

No, I mean that if he goes off to spend a day doing Don Stuff, (for instance he loves car shows, I would rather sit through a root canal.) He has several interests, that unfortunately I do not share. And sometimes I will complain that he is gone all the time and that I never get to see him or do things with him. It's not really fair of me to do this, and I realize that.

After all, I have six days a week to go anywhere I want and do what ever I feel like doing.

He only has after work and Saturday to get to do his things. So I try to not complain too much. But one thing he has always done is make it up to me. If he is going to spend Saturday hitting estate sales and going to swap meets and then going to some car show, he will take me out Friday night to do whatever it is I want to do.

See what a really swell guy he is?

Well for my Birthday he will take the day off just for me and spend the entire day basically being my Yes Man. "Hmm, I want to go to the fabric store" "Sure we'll go, which one?" "And I want to go shopping (shopping can be one of his least favorite activities). "Of course my Sweet any store you like". "And I want to have dinner at OutBack (for some reason this is a restaurant he really doesn't like) "OutBack? But of course we shall go to OutBack! Anything you wish my Darling"

I really do try to not take too much advantage.

Well, we started out the day by going to have breakfast at IHOP. And then I finally had decided to push for the new 37 inch flat screen TV I have wanted for our bedroom for a couple of years.

Donald,( son, not husband), says that a 37 inch is too big for my bedroom and that I will regret it. Well a big raspberry to him. That is what I want!

After breakfast we go to Best Buy to check out their TV's. No luck. It's funny because when you aren't looking to buy there seems to be so many to choose from, but the moment you come in with your checkbook ready to go, they suddenly have NOTHING!!!!

Okay, time for more catering to Susan.

I don't like to leave Shawn home by himself for too long, so I insist that we have to go home and get him and bring him with us on our TV search.

It's not so much the "having Shawn along" that bothers Don. It's more the going 12 or so miles out of our way to do it. The high cost of gas and all you know.

So he agrees, We go home to get Shawn.

It turns out to be a good thing to do anyway (well for me at least) because by now I have realized that I have dressed too warmly for the day and I need to change into something cooler.

Okay, off we go to continue looking for the right TV. "Why don't we just go to Costco?" Don asks. "Oh sure" I answer back. "Of course we will go to Costco, I just want to check out everybody else first."

In case you don't realize, Don is being VERY patient here.

We go to Target. A waste of time, and actually I have already checked out their TV's several times. It just seemed like the thing to do. All right, Fred Meyer! They have lots of TV's there, and besides there is a little bit of shopping I need to do there anyway.

Don, to his credit, doesn't even groan.

Well, a big No to the TV's at Freddies. One bright spot though. I had told the TV guy that I was curious about the new VIZIO brand of TV. He informed me that there are only two stores that carry them, Walmart and Costco. Then he told me to buy it at Costco, not Walmart, because VIZIO custom makes them for each store and the ones they make for Costco are better quality than the ones they do for Walmart.

Good to know.

And I figure this guy can be trusted because he doesn't work for either of them, so it's not like he's going to get anything out of it. I never really trust advice from someone who has something to gain.

Well a big relief for Don. One less store.

By now it's about 3:00. Time to get Shawn something to eat and then take him home so that we can spend the rest of the day and evening more or less on a date. We drop him off. I decide that I would like to go to an early movie. I decide that the movie should be Kung Foo Panda.

I don't actually look, but I'm pretty sure Don resisted the urge to roll his eyes.

Well, we get to Carmike in time for the 4:30ish showing, and the parking lot is JAM PACKED!!! I don't like seeing a movie in a crowded theater, unless I am there FIRST to pick the best seat. We were quite obviously NOT first.

Change of plans.

I suddenly realize how early it is. The importance of this is that I have always wanted to know just how early you have to arrive at OutBack on a Friday night to get seated right away. I always see people just so casually walking out of there around 6 or so. I just know that they are smugly thinking, "Yes that's right. You poor schlubs have to wait an hour and a half, while we got here early enough to already be out of here by 6." How early, I have always wondered is that?

We were about to find out.

It is just after 4:40. We park, we go in, and guess what??? We are seated immediately! Alright! Mystery solved. Be there at 4:45 if you don't want to wait.

We eat. We enjoy. We get a to-go box. We leave.

Time to get back to our TV search.

No more messing around. We go to Costco. We debate.

There are two 37 inch TV's there. One a Vizio, one a Toshiba. No contest I say. The Toshiba is only 50 dollars more than the Vizio, so of course we will get the Toshiba. Not so fast says the Coscto guy that comes to talk to us. He talks up the Vizio so well that you would expect that it must also walk on water. Now I am still a little nervous, but of course if you want to bring a TV that you aren't happy with back, Costco is for sure the store you want.

You don't even have to save the box!

So we end up buying the Vizio, and just like Don said, it even fit in the van.

We go home to set up our new TV and then watch a movie on it. Don doesn't really appreciate the challenge of having to start from scratch like this but he is more than willing, as long as I go away and leave him alone. (He is finally starting to show a little wear from his day of all YES) That's fine. I go up-stairs to the family room and get on the computer to read blogs and leave comments.

The TV is finally set up. I go downstairs and we watch our movie. The picture isn't nearly as good as I had hoped. I mention that maybe we should have Donald come over and see what he can do.

This does not go over very well.

It turns out that we hadn't actually simply just bought this TV. It turns out that we are actually auditioning this TV. It takes me a few days to get Don to accept this. He finally does have to admit though that this is not the TV of our dreams. We were going to have Vizio send a repair guy to give us his opinion. I realized how silly that was. We will take it back and get the Toshiba instead. So when Don gets home from work on Monday I inform him of our new plans.

He went along and played the game of "Try out the TV" pretty willingly, well, semi willingly, okay, not willingly, but for all intents and purposes it was still a birthday issue so he gave in.

To make a long story short.
We got to Costco with the TV, all the papers and extras and the receipt.
It turns out that I forgot to grab the remote.
It also turns out that they can't do anything until we get the remote.
Don leaves me there and goes home to get the remote and bring it back.
He finally gets back with the remote.
We complete the transaction (no need for details, but it was not entirely painless).

Home Sweet Home.

I know better than to stick around and offer my opinions so I head straight up-stairs.

Conclusion.

The TV is good. The cable DVR box is bad. I call the cable co. Yesterday they send a repair man with a new box. He hooks it up (properly) (No need for Don to know this).

We are finally happy with our new TV!!!

Don and I are still happily married.

Donald was WRONG. It works great in our room.

Everything is good.

THE END

Health and Beauty for Shawn

Okay, I decided that I need to do a fun, happy post because I realize my last one was a bit of a downer. And what subject makes for a fun and happy post I ask myself? Well one subject comes to mind almost immediately.

Shawn!

I hope that no one will think, "Oh no. Not another Shawn post. Won't this make like her tenth one?" No, not quite, but close. Anyway, I guess I have so much to say about this funny little guy of mine because he is the only child I still have to actively think about and provide mothering for on a daily basis. Everyone else around here can fend for themselves more or less. Shawn can in a pinch, but he is much happier if he knows I am there to keep an eye on him.

There are two things that have prompted this post.

First.

In one of my last posts I mentioned Shawn's love for the Health and Beauty sections of stores. I remember thinking at the time, "that will probably need some explaining" I didn't though because it would have changed the whole flavor of what I was writing about.

Second.

My sweet cousin-in-law, Debie Spurgeon has reached the grand total of 95 posts. To celebrate she is having a give- away. Her give-away just happens to be a really nice (and pretty complete too, from the looks of it) First Aid Kit.

Shawn LOVES First Aid Kits!

I wrote about that in the comment/entry into her give-away, that I left her. And then I started thinking, explaining all this would be a fun post.

So here goes.

Ever since Shawn was very small he has shown an interest in medical equipment. It is really sort of a weird paradox because he was terrified of hospitals and Dr offices. He needed to be hospitalized at least three times that I can think of but it was probably more like four. And he went to Dr appointments quite often. He had what was pretty much a never ending ear infection among other things (nothing ever very life threatening, thank goodness) Eventually, when he was around two, his ears got under control enough to have tubes put in them. There were other problems that he needed medical attention for so he pretty much would throw a fit when he saw that was were we were going.

Fortunately, a few of these doctors were able to distract him by letting him play with their unbreakable instruments. They let him look through the ear-o-scope (obviously I don't know the proper name) they would also let him see and handle the stethoscope This is pretty much the best reason I can come up with for him to love these kinds of things so much. For probably six years in a row for Christmas we would get him the Fisher Price Doctor Kit. It was a Christmas staple. So that was how (at least I think) Shawn developed his love for first aid.

Oh yeah, I'm forgetting commercials.

He loves all kinds of commercials. And he takes all their little slogans completely serious. You know like in Forrest Gump "do you have a cough due to a cold?" that is Shawn. Quite often he will repeat commercial slogans, little purple pill, have it your way, more bars in more places.

Get it? For Shawn, Coke really is the real thing.

Well enough plot exposition. ( That's a quote from The Great Muppet Caper, Shawn would totally get it.) Lets fast forward to now. Shawn has somehow taken his love for band aids and decided to embrace the whole health and beauty section. I always let him go off on his own in stores because I know I will either find him in Home Entertainment (this is most likely) or Health and beauty(just slightly less likely)
And by health and beauty I don't mean the make-up and perfume aisle.

Thank goodness he's never taken an interest there.

No, I am talking soap, shampoo, shaving cream (a huge favorite), MANLY body wash (you know like Old Spice) ointments (all kinds except diaper) and toothpastes and mouthwash. In other words the kind of products that most of us buy because we are running low not because we have seen the commercial.

Now call me cheap but some products (shampoo not included) I will just as soon buy the store brand instead of the name brand.

This is agony for Shawn.

He really can't grasp this concept of choosing store brand over something that is worthy enough to be shown on TV. And usually with a real nice slogan to boot. I will give you a small example of how this works.

Here I am, done with my shopping at, oh, let's say Walmart. Time to go find Shawn. Over to the Movie Section. Hmmm. Where is Shawn? I'm surprised he's not here.

Okay, plan B.

Health and Beauty.

Okay, shampoo aisle. No Shawn.

Soap aisle? Nope not here.

Razor Blades and Shaving Cream (sure thing) Huh? Not here either.

Oh there he is. Looking at the hydracortisone cream and the neosporin.

Now as usual, I notice one of his hands curled around something. Oh no, here we go again. Shawn I ask, what do you have in your hand. Now don't get the wrong impression he would never try to shoplift.

No it's much more complex than that.

He has developed a pretty good instinct for things that I will say no to. And five dollar an ounce antibacterial whatever, is one of those things. Shawn's dilemma is that he will not know a moment's peace until it is his and he can take it home and find several uses for it in just the first ten minutes.

So for this reason he has it mostly hidden in his hand. He wants it so badly but he knows what I will say and so I guess he just tries to prolong the facade that Mom will say "Oh, of course, go ahead and put it in the basket."

Now please realize that I do not have a heart made of stone.

So every once in a while I will say those magic words that he wants so bad to hear and he will go home very happy.That would be ONCE in a while.

My daughter Heidi thinks I should just give in and buy him what he wants and lately I have been taking her advice more and more, but there are just some things I CANNOT spend money on. For instance an eight dollar and forty seven cent, two ounce container of antibacterial hand sanitizer spray.

Sorry, sometimes my inner robo-consumer just takes over and I am helpless.

Now one thing I will do, is litter his Christmas stocking and Easter basket with all of these things he loves so much. He also has gotten a new first aid kit every year for Christms for more years than I can remember.

A couple of years ago he simply had to have these fancy, Teflon coated, antibacterial soaked, silver lined, 100 percent water proof band-aids. I had told him No so many times on these, that I literally could feel myself de-evolving into a broken record.

So imagine my surprise when he showed me that Santa had come through for him and put them in his stocking.

Oh yes, he gets toothpaste and mouthwash, cans of highly advertised but prohibitively expensive shaving cream, waterless hand gel, and yes of course all the different kinds of band aids that unless you are an aficionado like Shawn you had never even imagined existed.

He gets all of these, and he is HAPPY!!!

That is until the next time we go shopping.

The Death of Dignity

I'm not a really big TV watcher. But I do like to have the TV on in the morning. It just seems friendlier. I almost always watch the Today Show. And usually I like the Today Show. I usually turn the TV to channel six the night before and then when I turn it on between 8 and 9, I can rewind it and watch just the parts I want to see. Thus skipping past the local news and weather, which I watch once but I hate seeing the same thing three or more times an hour.

I also skip past segments that I find boring. Well yesterday there was a segment on that really bothered me.

First a little background though.

The Today Show is really big on telling tragic stories. Stories of disasters. Stories of great harm. Stories of great loss. The thing that really disturbs and annoys me is that they LOVE to put the people involved in these tragic, harmful, disastrous stories of loss on the air to talk about,

HOW THEY FEEL.

It really makes me sick. Gee your whole school has been shot up by a really angry kid who couldn't take the bullying anymore.

HOW DO YOU FEEL? CAN YOU DESCRIBE WHAT IT FELT LIKE?

Hey you just watched a devastating tornado blow your whole town away.

CAN YOU TELL US WHAT IT WAS LIKE TO SEE THIS HAPPEN RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU? HOW ABOUT YOUR CHILDREN? HOW DO YOU THINK THEY HAVE BEEN AFFECTED?

I hate this kind of cheap, voyeuristic, tawdry kind of intrusion that passes for real news these days.

The thing that makes me the most angry are the people that are a part of the tragedy who are so willing to sell themselves out just to be on TV.

If my family experienced a horrible disaster and lost everything including one of our own or neighbors or friends, you can be sure that the first time someone tried to stick a microphone in my face and ask me HOW DO YOU FEEL?

Well lets just say that they would need to get a new microphone.

This is how I feel. I can't believe the people who are willing to sell their selves out for a few moments of notoriety.

So yesterday morning I'm watching the Today Show and of course there are all the horribly sad stories of death and destruction. There have been so many natural disasters lately that I am starting to think that these really are the last days. Now one of the most awful things they showed was a house on a lake in one of the I states.

Indiana, Illinois, I can't keep track.

Anyway, this house had been completely swept away by this huge flood. I'm sure that several of you have probably seen the footage. It was really a sad thing to watch. So the next thing they say is "We will have the family who's house this was, on right after these messages." Okay, time for a few commercials. Then we are back to the Today Show. " Alright, we now go to Anne ( I think it was Anne) who is with the blah, blah, blah, family, who's house we have just watched being swept away. Yes here we are standing on what is left of their property. Cue to Anne standing there with the mom and dad, and, (I was sickened to see) their three little girls!

Well Mr Blah, Blah, Blah, can you tell us what happened here?

What happened here???? Isn't it painfully obvious from the footage that has been shown at least twenty times, what has HAPPENED here?

And the man, oh the man, he is obviously in his element. He goes on and on about what they've lost and how they didn't have flood insurance because the insurance co. could never get their figures straight. Yeah, he's building up a pretty good head of steam, when I happen to look at his oldest daughter.

This poor little girl was by my guesstimate around nine or ten. Now I take nine or ten year olds pretty personally. My oldest granddaughter, my precious Abbey is nine going on ten. Jan's sweet little daughter Mattie just turned ten.

Yes I take it pretty personal.

And what is this poor little oldest daughter doing? She is trying her hardest not to cry is what she is doing. I look at this dear little girl as she listens to her father going on and on about how they have lost everything and how they have no idea what they will do for the near future, (well actually, I think he said they would have to live with relatives for the time being.) And all the while that he is having his big moment in the spotlight, his little girl just looks more and more crushed.

I was so angry.

What kind of parent exposes a child, who has just witnessed something no child should ever have to witness, to such a travesty, as having to be on camera for the whole world to drink in her sorrow?

What kind of parent indeed?

What has happened to us as a people to be so careless with these most precious gifts that our children are?

Why are people so willing to give up their dignity for the opportunity to spend some time in the spotlight? And why on earth do they drag their children along with them? And why does the Today Show and all the other News/Magazine shows encourage these people to do it?

And I guess what I really have to ask myself, is why do I watch it?

I don't even have a good answer to that. All I know if I am to be honest is that watching shows that one moment will be showing something horrible like this and then after the commercials and local news breaks they will have a segment on the "Coolest Clothes This Hot Summer" is that I myself am part of the problem.

HOW DOES THAT MAKE YOU FEEL?

Fun at the Movies

I mentioned in my earlier postings on Shawn that since he has been out of school he has been a little bored and at a loss for things to do. He attends a wonderful program at the ARC called VIP. This is on Tuesdays and Thursdays and even though technically, they can usually sign up for one of the activities a week since outings are limited to ten people. Shawn is usually first on the waiting list so most weeks he gets to go both days.

So Tuesdays and Thursdays are covered.

That just leaves the other five days. Really four days since Sunday is pretty well taken up with church. So that leaves Monday, Wednesday, Friday and Saturday. Now Shawn does spend a lot of time in his room watching TV and I know that this is not the best situation. I usually bring him along with me when I run errands if it is a Shawn kinda place I'm going to. That would be anywhere with a movie-home entertainment-section or a health and beauty dept.

Yes Shawn loves health and beauty departments. I guess that will have to be explained in another post.

Now of all the things that Shawn enjoys, movies are probably one of the biggest. In fact (and I think I already mentioned this in one of my other posts about him) I don't think there are many times when he doesn't have at least one movie running through his head.

So probably the best thing I do for Shawn is take him to the movies.

We always go to the matinee and we have (well mostly me I guess) decided that we like the Fairchild Cinemas in Pasco best.

It is the most geographically desirable.

That might sound strange since we live clear over in Kennewick pretty close to the Kennewick Walmart. The reason that Fairchild is best for us is that once a week I take my mom to dialysis. The dialysis building is pretty much in the parking lot of the Fairchild Cinema. So we drop mom off around 12. And then depending on what time the movie starts we might kill a little time at Yokes or Walmart.

Okay, I believe that is adequate background.

Now the only problem with our movie plans is when there isn't a movie worth seeing. This happens quite often. Sometimes when the selection is pretty limited, but it's been so long between movies I decide to suffer through a horrible movie for Shawn's sake. This is how I ended up sitting through the hour and a half torture that was "The Simpson Movie".

I still want that time back.

Well right now there are quite a few good movie out. The early summer releases and all. Last week we went and saw "Indiana Jones". It was pretty good. I don't know if I would want to sit through it again with Don, but I don't think I'll have to because for some reason he doesn't seem terribly interested in it.

I also seemed to have dodged taking Shawn to see "Speed Racer". I knew if I could hold out long enough that there would be enough good movies out to distract him from Good Ol Speed.

Now the one that we have both been looking forward to was "Kung Foo Panda." I love Jack Black. He is just so darn cute and likable. Cute in a cabbage patch kid way, not a Brad Pitt or David Cook way. Last weekend Kung Foo Panda opened. Don and I almost went to see it on my birthday. I was hoping if we went to an earlier matinee it wouldn't be too crowded yet.

Wrong!

It was very very crowded. Needless to say we did not go. I sort of have a feeling that Don thinks he dodged a bullet.

( Gee Susan nice using the word dodged twice in one post)

Well needless to say, today was, take mom to dialysis day. I had not seen Kung Foo Panda, Shawn wanted very much to see Kung Foo Panda.

So guess what Shawn and I did today????

Good guess. We saw Kung Foo Panda.

It was really good. I'm not real big on Dream Works computer animation. I am not a fan of their "Shrek" movies. And they seem to take so much pride in those ones too. I did however really like "Madagascar".

Well I can highly recommend "Kung Foo Panda". It was cute. They didn't try to impress you with how cool they are by throwing in a bunch of Hip, Cultural References or by using a lot of inappropriate innuendos. Nope it was just a sweet, cute movie about learning to have faith in yourself and following your dreams. I really liked it.

Shawn LOVED it!

Now Shawn, like a lot of other mentally disabled people, does not have a lot of, emotional control, I guess you could call it. When he enjoys something, brother you will know he is enjoying it. He isn't self conscious like regular people, and I have never tried to steer him in that direction either. So when he finds something amusing he laughs with his whole heart.

He was practically rolling in the aisles today.

Now fortunately I am hardly ever embarrassed by Shawn. Only when he does something really bad like throw a fit in public. But you know I don't think even then I am embarrassed by him. Probably more frustrated than anything.

When we are at the movies though, I am never at all embarrassed by Shawn enjoying himself. Yes he is probably laughing louder than and more frequently than anyone else in the theatre. He may be rubbing his hands together. (Something he does when he is really happy and/or excited.) But I just have fun being with him.

I love to watch him enjoy himself.

I think everyone would be just a little bit happier if we could experience the utter abandon that these special people feel when they are immersed in a joyful moment.

So if you are ever at the movies or another event and are lucky enough to be seated by a special needs person, please take the time to enjoy them, enjoying themselves. I guarantee your spirit will be lightened and your outlook will be brighter.

Now that I think of it, that is how I survived " The Simpson Movie".

Good Stuff/Bad Stuff

I seem to be at a loss for something to write about. I can think of quite a few little things but nothing worth a whole post. So I have decided to ruminate on some things that make me happy and some things that really leave me steamed.

These, of course will be in no particular order.

This is probably really bad but here goes. I loved that there was a Sunday this last winter when the snow and various other weather conditions were so bad that they cancelled church. Now every once in a while I will wake up in the morning and just not feel like going to church. I think a lot of the time it's just the getting ready for church that I hate, not so much the going. In fact for the last four, maybe more like five, years, I have celebrated Mother's Day by giving myself the day off. That means not having to get myself ready. That means having a nice slow morning to stay in bed, to get up eventually, when I feel like it, to really take some time reading the paper.

You get the idea.

The only little kink in this guilt free day off, is that it's not really guilt free. Even though I tell myself that I feel no guilt I actually do. So when we got word that Church has been cancelled I was so thrilled to really truly have a real honest to goodness guilt free day off from church. And I refuse to fall into the trap of feeling guilty for not thinking, oh no they have cancelled church? But I love getting up and getting ready for, and then going to Church. Oh dear, a Sunday off? Whatever shall I do?

Nope. Sorry folks. I was actually giddy when I heard the news. After all, I am not a child anymore. My school days are far behind me. So I will take my snow days where I can get them.

All right now for something that gets me steamed.

Well obviously for those who have read my blog, you know how I feel about toilet paper so I will leave that topic alone. Well, except to say that I am definitely an OVER not UNDER girl.

Okay, hmm something that makes me lose it. Hmmm. Oh I've got a good one!

I HATE it when you are at a light going straight and there is a lane either to your left or your right that seems to go straight but you know (and everyone else knows) that the extra lane really ends and those people in it will have to turn off to the left or the right. So here I am, being a good citizen, sitting and waiting in my proper lane behind six other people who are also being good citizens. Then some little HOT SHOT who thinks they are too good to wait in line with everyone else comes speeding up to the front of the extra lane. You know that they are going to try to peel ahead of everyone in the lane that goes through and thus get to the front of the line, ahead of everyone of those patient good citizens who were willing to take their turns.

My own son does this. In fact he has made an art of it.

Now as much as this bugs me, and if I am to be completely honest, I have actually done this myself from time to time. (Hey, I never said I wasn't a hypocrite) But this is when I really get mad. It's when someone has done this and for whatever reason they couldn't get over into the going through lane, so it looks like they are going to have to turn right instead.

Of course they had NO intention of turning right they just wanted to get ahead of all the good people willing to play nice and take turns.

So what do they do? They try to bully their way into the lane where they really want to be.

I HATE THIS!!!!!

About the only time I ever tailgate is when I see some jerk doing just this. So I pull up really close behind the person in front of me so that mister pushy-pants can't cut in front of me. I know I know.

Turn the other cheek and all.

Well, they didn't have cars back then and I can't help but think that if they did it would have said "except when driving."

Okay, now something happy.

I love my Granddaughters. I have five you know.

In two weeks, my two oldest granddaughters, my daughter Heidi's two girls, will be done with school. They live in Spokane. Their names are Abbey and Lindsay. They are sweet darling delightful children, and I can't wait to have them come spend time with me in the summer.

Alexandra and Lorelai (Elisabeth is too young to remember them and besides she has other things on her mind at the moment.) well Lex and Lori love their cousins.
There are few things I find more satisfying than having all four of my oldest granddaughters together.

Last summer Lisa and I spent lots of time taking the girls to the park. It was probably one of the best things we did all summer. And it was great when Abbey and Lindsay were here because they could come with us and it was lovely watching them all play together.

The only little problem (really just a fraction of a little problem) when Abbey and Lindsay are staying with me, is that they sleep in my living room. I take the back cushions off my couch to make it a little wider and make a nice bed for Abbey. Then I take the two bottom cushions from my two matching chair- and- a- half's, and make a bed on the floor for Lindsay. Of course we bring in plenty of blankets. And of course their suitcase usually is kept in my living room. So every morning it is a pain in the neck putting everything back where it belongs. But like I said this is just a small inconvenience.

One more happy thought. I don't want to sound too negative after all.

We, and by this I mean We, as in I have the idea and Don carries it out. So we have a newly planted raspberry patch. Yahoo! I love fresh raspberries. I love to eat them. I love to make freezer raspberry jam with them. I can't think of anything more wonderful than to finally have my own raspberries.

For years Don has said no.

Somehow I have talked him into it. I had to go online to find the plants because I couldn't find anything locally. I somehow misunderstood the amount on the website. I meant to buy nine plants and somehow they arrived as thirty plants. Don planted them all. I'm not sure how they will do that packed together. Don says they will be fine, in the way that a man who doesn't want any more work will insist that everything will be fine.

We'll see.

If things start getting a little crowded I will probably start offering free raspberry plants to anyone who wants them.

We shall see.

Well my little post of this and that seems to have turned into a rather lengthy post of several this and thats. I can think of more happy things and unhappy things but they will have to wait for another time.

I would love to hear about your happys and unhappys. I do love comments even if we don't know each other. After all isn't that part of the fun of blogging.

So until next time, HAVE A GREAT DAY!!!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME ! ! ! ! !

I am writing this tonight (that would be Thursday June 5th). Because tomorrow (that would be June 6th) is my Big Ole Fat Happy Birthday!!!!!

I shall be fifty one.

Yes I am more than half a century old. I am older than Wal-Mart. I am older than Target. I am one year older than Pizza Hut. I am two years younger than Disneyland.

I can easily remember a time before computers and cell phones. ( Heck even before cordless phones.) Before CD's which according to my kids are now practically passe.

I remember the barbaric times when girls had to wear dresses to school, and we were told that if we didn't we would not act like ladies. Finally we were allowed to wear pants (but NOT jeans) every other Friday. And eventually that led to being allowed to wear pants every day, by the time I reached 9th grade. I never wore another dress to school. Ever.

And believe it or not girls still managed to be fairly civilized.

I remember the sixties, even though I was still a kid. I actually even remember where I was when I heard that President Kennedy had been shot.

I remember poodle skirts and bobby socks ( I was probably five or six) And I remember them giving way to mini- skirts and go-go boots.

I remember when anything physcadelic was cooler than anything. (I don't think we really even could describe that word but believe me we knew what it was)

I remember going to Shakeys Pizza Parlour for Pizza and Farrels ice cream parlour for ice cream.

I remember when McDonalds were just tiny little walk in places with no seating and no Big-macs, only hamburgers, cheese burgers, fillet o fish, french fries and milkshakes.

On a more local note.

Even though I was born and raised in Seattle, both my Parents were from the Tri-Cities. My Dad's family were the Brinkerhoffs from Richland and My mom's were the Mathews from Pasco. I loved, LOVED, the Tri- Cities.

Coming here was one of my greatest joys.

I remember spending summers here. I was lucky to have my uncles Richard and Keith who were one year older than me and one year younger than me. In Summertime we would walk all over Richland. Going to 7-11 and getting slurpies and going to what is now the George Prout Memorial pool and swimming and more swimming. Richard and I were especially close. We loved to make all kinds of concoctions in the kitchen and quite a few of them were highly edible. Grandma Brinkerhoff had a creepy crawlers toy stove and plenty of goop and we would make and eat creepy crawlers.

I loved going to Grandma Mathews in Pasco. I absolutely loved driving past the grapevines on our way to her house in early Autumn and how much I loved the smell of those grapes. Most importantly though were my Aunt Carolyn, who was I think, four years older than me and my twin uncles Loren and Leon who were two years older. Carolyn was just old enough to be fascinating to me. She was so pretty and so cool and she willingly let us play with her Barbies. Hanging out with the twins was some of the most fun I ever had. We got into so much trouble but it was fun trouble. I learned more than I ever wanted to know about body-building from the twins. I also became very familiar with their early taxidermy efforts.

Back Home.

I remember the 70's. Those were actually my years.

School went from bad, to really bad, to not so bad, to just happy that it's over and I would never do it again. Although I do have some incredible memories from those times. Several of them (like I mentioned in previous posts) Not anything to be proud of but then I think sometimes anything it takes to survive teenagerhood is worth it. At least as long as you know when to walk away with no lasting damage.

Yes I can say that I am truly happy sitting here at fifty-one. It has taken a lot to get here and yes some of it wasn't pretty but I can't honestly think of anything I would change. Not that it was so great, but because, I wouldn't want to take a chance that my now would be any different.
And I hope that everyone reading this can agree with me that, yes, life is never perfect, but it sure is ,

ONE HECK OF A RIDE!!!!!!!


So Happy 51st Birthday to me.

Mad About Toilet Paper

I am outraged, OUTRAGED! I don't know how many of you buy toilet paper, but I am guessing quite a few. I mean whats the alternative? Taking a really big purse into a public toilet and stocking up?

Not and keep your Temple Recommend you won't.

Well I don't know how many of you pay attention to that toilet paper you are buying, but for simplicities sake I will just pretend that I will be pointing things out to you that you may not have thought of before.

Okay Class is in Session.

Years ago I had a friend and neighbor who was probably one of the most frugal people I had ever met. She really didn't need to be because I knew that her husband made really good money. That made no difference to her. She had figured out so many things that were necessary to live within or way under your means, and she would share them in such a non-threatening, non-judgemental way, that I think all of us that lived by her learned a lot in the three years we all lived by each other.

This is one of the most eye-opening things she ever pointed out to me.

One day I was at her house while she was putting away groceries. She came to the toilet paper and all of a sudden she went from mild mannered Elaine to Super Robo Consumer Elaine. She showed me the toilet paper she had just purchased and practically snarled, "look at this". Okay. Not wanting her to turn on me I did look at that. I see toilet paper, I told her. "No no, not that!"
She then pointed out to me how many of SHEETS were in the four pack of TP. Uh okay.

I was humoring her at this point.

She proceeded to show me that there were, now I don't really remember the actual number, this was like over 25 years ago, so lets say there were 275. As I remember that is pretty close.

So 275 sheets per roll. I didn't know what to say. Was that a good number or bad. I suddenly felt so irresponsible, to never have noticed how many sheets there were in a roll of toilet paper.
I took a stab at it though and asked "is that not good?" "No" she said a little more calmly. I think she saw the fight or flight look on my face. Then we spent the next ten minutes with her telling me that she never got toilet paper with less than 300 sheets per roll. She was angry that brand after brand of TP had been slowly but surely decreasing how much product was actually in any plastic wrapped bag of that bathroom necessity. As she explained this all to me I started to understand what she meant. Up to this point in my toilet paper shopping career, I had always gone for whatever was the cheapest. I was suddenly very eager to go home and check out my toilet paper supplies and see how many squares-per-roll my store brand TP had.

I went home. I checked. It was not good.

I don't remember how many sheets per roll there were but it certainly wasn't 275. Hmmpphh. So much for my bargain brand. From then on I was always aware of not just the price of my TP but also sheets per roll.

Now lets fast forward about fifteen years, give or take a few. They suddenly started selling "double" packs of toilet paper. Now by this time there was no pulling one over on me. I of course was skeptical. Amazingly though the first few years of this double roll business, they really did, almost, have double rolls in those packages.

Not quite, but close. Close.

Well I wondered how long good old Proctor & Gamble and Northern and all the rest of these companies would be able to resist their usual tricks of slowly, methodically, giving less and asking for more.

It did not take long.

Within a year and a half I noticed that what was once, say 480 sheets, was suddenly magically reduced to 450 sheets.

Too small for almost anyone to notice, right?

Over the next several years it got more and more flagrant. I didn't understand why consumers weren't crying FOUL. Then I remembered that if my old friend Elaine, hadn't shown me the way all those years ago I wouldn't have noticed either.

Of course the next step, in what I am sure has been a very planned, 10 year plan, was to systematically start getting rid of their single rolls altogether. In fact, I dare you to go to any store that carries toilet paper and try to find more than one package of single roll TP.

And do you know why that is?

That is because the average supreme double roll of toilet paper these days has on average 200 sheets. Yes that's right only 200. I get so angry when I see this. I mean do you have any idea how skimpy a 100 sheet roll of toilet paper would be? You would need a new roll probably every day and a half. So how dare they claim that 200 is a DOUBLE roll.

Less than that if you have kids.

After all, you know how kids, especially the younger ones, tear off a five foot long piece of the stuff. No matter how thick, absorbant and cushy it is.

Believe it or not there are still a few bargains to be found. Costco, at least the last time I checked, had around 425 or so on their Kirkland brand. It may not be the best or softest but, who says you have to use it in your own bathroom. For a few years though I have found a pretty good deal and it is of course at Walmart. It is the White Cloud brand. Granted it's not up there with Cottonelle or Charmin, but have you noticed how many sheets per roll those ones have?
The new super premium super soft Charmin has 200. Courtney calls me cheap but I just can't see spending that much on something that is used for, well you know what it is used for.

So I'm at Walmart the other day and I needed to get soap and toilet paper. I headed straight for the White Cloud. There were the 12 double roll package for around 6 bucks. I grabbed a package and even though I know it has 352 sheets (it used to have 425. See what I mean!) For some reason though I checked out the sheet count. It was 308. THREE HUNDRED and EIGHT.
What is with the eight? I couldn't believe it. I looked through all of them hoping, and sure enough there were a few packages that still had 352.

I had only planned to buy one package but instead I grabbed two.

I was so mad at how shopping these days is just one rip off after another. When I got to the check stand, the checker was a really nice lady that I have talked to before. I was so steamed at this point that I just had to point out to her my outrage over this whole toilet paper conspiracy. She had never thought about it before and she was really glad that I had pointed it out to her.

Now maybe I am wrong and several of my readers have noticed this TP problem already. If you have then I guess we are on the same page. But if you have never noticed this before, I hope that you are as outraged as I am. And if not I hope you have not minded too much my latest rant. I am thinking of sending a strongly worded letter to some of the big TP companies and letting them know that I am on to them.

I am no stranger to writing strongly worded letters.

And the thing is, for every letter they get that arrives by snail-mail they figure that said letter represents several thousand people. So if you ever want to get a strong message to any company about any thing send it snail-mail.

Okay. Class dismissed.